We have had a busy Advent. My big plans of resting and reconnecting have been sidelined by all my other big plans of fun and doing. There is so much opportunity to enjoy! the! season! It is only the second week of Advent and I am tired. The added activities are all good and the added learning is wonderful to see in my children, but maybe we have done enough. I'm getting angry at all the commercials, all the wants, and all the extra stress that have descended on our little house. What's the use? Why am I teaching these kids anything good if all they want is crap? (I'm pretty sure God thinks this about us occasionally)
Today was a sick day for us. Deli was up most of last night vomiting and dry heaving. It began at bedtime and lasted through to morning. We canceled Spanish, we canceled most of school, we canceled work and learning. We watched movies and read books. We ate chicken noodle soup. Nobody else is sick, maybe Del was overtired?
We had our moments of peace.
I caught the children playing with our pewter manger scene that Abuela gave us a few years ago. When the kidlets got big enough to start breaking our other Nativity set, Abuela bought us this one. Up until now, the pieces have been used as weapons, something to make me grimace and grumble under my breath. But we have turned a corner. They are now used as something that makes me smile.
Today was a sick day for us. Deli was up most of last night vomiting and dry heaving. It began at bedtime and lasted through to morning. We canceled Spanish, we canceled most of school, we canceled work and learning. We watched movies and read books. We ate chicken noodle soup. Nobody else is sick, maybe Del was overtired?
We had our moments of peace.
I caught the children playing with our pewter manger scene that Abuela gave us a few years ago. When the kidlets got big enough to start breaking our other Nativity set, Abuela bought us this one. Up until now, the pieces have been used as weapons, something to make me grimace and grumble under my breath. But we have turned a corner. They are now used as something that makes me smile.
The Winter Is Cold, Is Cold
by Madeleine L’Engle
The winter is cold, is cold.
All’s spent in keeping warm.
Has joy been frozen, too?
I blow upon my hands
Stiff from the biting wind.
My heart beats slow, beats slow.
What has become of joy?
If joy’s gone from my heart
Then it is closed to You
Who made it, gave it life.
If I protect myself
I’m hiding, Lord, from you.
How we defend ourselves
In ancient suits of mail!
Protected from the sword,
Shrinking from the wound,
We look for happiness,
Small, safety-seeking,dulled,
Selfish, exclusive, in-turned.
Elusive, evasive, peace comes
Only when it’s not sought.
Help me forget the cold
That grips the grasping world.
Let me stretch out my hands
To purifying fire,
Clutching fingers uncurled.
Look! Here is the melting joy.
My heart beats once again.
by Madeleine L’Engle
The winter is cold, is cold.
All’s spent in keeping warm.
Has joy been frozen, too?
I blow upon my hands
Stiff from the biting wind.
My heart beats slow, beats slow.
What has become of joy?
If joy’s gone from my heart
Then it is closed to You
Who made it, gave it life.
If I protect myself
I’m hiding, Lord, from you.
How we defend ourselves
In ancient suits of mail!
Protected from the sword,
Shrinking from the wound,
We look for happiness,
Small, safety-seeking,dulled,
Selfish, exclusive, in-turned.
Elusive, evasive, peace comes
Only when it’s not sought.
Help me forget the cold
That grips the grasping world.
Let me stretch out my hands
To purifying fire,
Clutching fingers uncurled.
Look! Here is the melting joy.
My heart beats once again.
4 comments:
What a wonderful poem! It spoke volumes to me - forget this finger chilling cold and look to our Savior who gave His all for us! Thanks, Kris! And the pictures are precious!
Oh Kris how this poem moved me today in my weak and tired body desperate for that purifying fire but constantly making choices that potentially freeze my joy. Prayers for you and your family.
I'm not sure I have ever read Madeleine L'Engle's poetry. I loved it as much as I imagined I would - especially on this freezing day. I hope the vomiting in your house ends with sweet little Del! Snuggle up with your babies around that comforting fireplace of yours!
I especially enjoyed:
We look for happiness,
Small, safety-seeking,dulled,
Selfish, exclusive, in-turned.
Elusive, evasive, peace comes
Only when it’s not sought.
We are thinking along the same lines today - nativities that will not break, trying to talk our children out of the 'crap' they want.
Thanks for your honesty and the lovely poem. Stay healthy!
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